As a young girl I got the message that I was supposed to seek love and approval from outside of myself.

Sure, I was encouraged to be somewhat strong and independent, but not too much, or that would upset others. That my true worth came from others accepting me.

Well obviously that idea made me want to barf and I immediately realized something was VERY off with that way of operating. 

That way of living just wasn’t going to work for me.

I wasn’t sure exactly how I was going to navigate this world but I knew I wasn’t going to let others control me.

I spent years feeling like I constantly had to fight to be myself in a world where everything was telling me to be something else. From magazines, to television, school, and even church telling me something was wrong with me!l 

Maybe you got a similar message that something is not quite right with you and that someone else knows better. Their way of dressing is better, speaking, beliefs etc is somehow superior to yours.

That all feels l...

Do you tend to play small?

As a child were you told that you were too much?

Maybe you heard messages like; don’t say that, stop running around and being so loud.

Or, you might have been more naturally quiet and sensitive. Labeled as shy, passive. Picked on and told to loosen up and relax a bit more. 

Whatever the specific messages were for you at some point you decided that you’re too much of something and just not good enough.

Now that doesn’t mean that is your full identity and you walk around feeling terrible all day.

But, those energies of wondering if you will be too much, or doing something wrong, do run in the background of your mind and influence your daily habits.

Whatever you don’t accept about yourself others can show up and attack those parts.

Only because you judge and reject it within.

When you can allow the shameful, yucky, and “unwanted” parts to just be there without making them wrong; that is true freedom.

You hold yourself in bondage by pushing again...

Do you guide your thoughts; or do they control you most of the time?

Many of us were taught that life just happens to us and that even our thoughts are out of our control.

But what if you DO have control of your thoughts, especially where you focus them…

Perhaps you noticed that any attempt you make to stretch past old ways of thinking and being can feel uncomfortable and even like there’s a battle going on within you.

There is actually a battle going on at times.

Between parts of you that think they are protecting you by staying the same and the parts that know you’re safe and it's time to choose differently!

Our choices are influenced by so many factors that there’s no possible way to know them all.

And good thing that’s not required to live a more conscious life.

But it is good to know that most of the triggers will show up from childhood programming and wounding. 

When you find yourself suddenly terrified of being abandoned, afraid people are mad at you, or that it's...

Are you stuck in a sad story?

Do you find that you feel an urge to continuously talk about a certain negative event?

We all have unpleasant experiences and some can be traumatic and take a moment to move past.

But, you may notice at times you are overindulging in an unpleasant story/memory.

There is a big difference between searching for a different perspective/healing of something and getting value out of rehashing it.

Here are 4 common patterns I see with overindulging in unhappy stories: 

1.  You get attention- There’s nothing wrong with attention. But if you grew up with neglect(that’s just one example) you may find yourself unconsciously craving attention, even if it comes from drama and unpleasant experiences.
2.   A distraction/excuse- To not choose something different. This is often a way we avoid responsibility for creating our lives. Yes, even the so-called “bad stuff” But, you can choose something entirely different at any moment.
3.  Approval- Connecting to others thro...