Who's Responsible?
I was thinking the other day about who is responsible for my life.
It's easy to say, "well me of course; I’m responsible for my own life. Other people can and do help me, but I have to take responsibility and stay in my power."
Questioning myself helped me realize how often I’ve taken responsibility for what happens in others lives as well.
You can contribute to others, but it is not your obligation to live their lives or take on their stuff!
How many people’s lives do you think you are responsible for?
Just go with the first number that comes up.
Pretty crazy huh?! If you’ve never thought about this before I think you’ll start noticing how much of your time, energy and attention is going towards other people's lives.
What they’re doing, creating, possibly overextending yourself to assist them in reaching their goals. Helping and being there for people we care about is great, but there is a limit.
Do you find that you’re unable to get...
Dynamic Family
The dynamics of each family are different and can certainly be a source of stress, struggle, and stuck-ness for many.
As a child, you want to make your parents/caregivers, grandparents and other family members happy and proud of you. You depend on them for survival and need them to be accepting of or risk being ostracized.
A very common thing I see and remember doing myself as a child is processing for my parents.
How many times have you watched very young kids throwing a fit and wonder what is going on, why can't they control their child better?!
Well, most often they are processing feelings and emotions that their parents are squishing down and avoiding.
Kids are super aware of energies and emotions, even if they are unable to express them verbally. That pattern of the child taking on their parents' pain and suffering started long ago and can be passed down in families.
I sometimes see this in the DNA and until someone in the family has the awareness and...
Uncomfortable Yet?
For most people comfort is the ultimate goal in life.
We usually stick to people and situations that are safe and predictable. And if we do happen to do something out of our comfort zones it is often because we are forced to.
Most of us don’t volunteer to give public speeches, really anything that puts us in the spotlight, and how often have you finished a workout thinking that it was so uncomfortable and you never wanted to work out again?! LOL!
Throughout most of my life, I was on a quest to find safety and comfort.
I was so serious about being comfortable at all times, because I was so UNcomfortable. I began to isolate myself to the extreme!
To say I became a little bit of a control freak is an understatement. At the time I didn’t realize that I was super aware of others thoughts, feelings, and energies.
I just knew that I felt overloaded regularly and believed if I could just control everything; that would mean finding that ultimate comfort I was seeking.
...
Asking for Help
This week I want to talk about something that has been on my mind for a very long time, years. The idea of asking for help and all the “stuff” that brings up for people.
I’ve noticed many experiencing resistance, judgment, and guilt around asking for help.
Most of my life I felt tons of judgment towards myself for asking for any help. So I understand why people avoid asking others for help and how it could be viewed as a bad or disempowering thing.
But what if it's not a bad thing?
If you’re going through something and you require more info, ideas, a different perspective on things, just ask. If you were to speak up and ask, maybe things would flow so much easier.
Why stress yourself out spinning in circles trying to resolve something, when you could perhaps ask and have the situation shift, sometimes in an instant!
I find it funny that most of you wouldn’t hesitate to take your car to a mechanic, pay a restaurant to help you with cooking meals, or...
How may I help you?
Did you all hear about the terrible thing that happened to so and so? It's awful, the poor family. What about the war in that country somewhere over there? And did you hear that my friend's mom who is diagnosed with a horrible life threatening disease And! My neighbor's cat just died yesterday?!
After reading that paragraph notice do you feel slimed, yucky and hopeless? Perhaps you feel tension in your body.
Each day we are bombarded with information and ongoing conversations similar to those above. Even if we are doing our best to focus on happy thoughts, we can quickly find ourselves 30 minutes into an all out complaining and scary b*tch-fest. It accomplishes nothing but making you feel worse and confused, rather than actually adding anything helpful.
So, what can you do?
First, be aware of what you're currently doing. How are you reacting to these types of situations right now?
Many people tell me they want to help. Whether it's a world issue, a sick...
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