I was thinking the other day about who is responsible for my life. It's easy to say, "well me of course; I’m responsible for my own life. Other people can and do help me, but I have to take responsibility and stay in my power." Questioning myself helped me realize how often we take responsibility for what happens in others lives as well. We can contribute to others, but it is not our obligation to live their lives or take on their stuff!
How many people’s lives do you think you are responsible? Just go with the first number that comes up. Pretty crazy huh?! If you’ve never thought about this before I think you’ll start noticing how much of your time, energy and attention is going towards other peoples lives. What they’re doing, creating, possibly overextending yourself to assist them in reaching their goals. Helping and being there for people we care about is great, but there is a line.
Do you find that you’re unable to get necessary things done for yourself because you have so many people pulling at you? If you see you feel guilty saying no or you go into all the reason, you must do this and that for people. Realize you just gave your power away and took all freedom of choice out of the equation. When we offer too much of ourselves, it often causes resentment to grow. We usually don’t tell the other person that we feel overburdened often because we think we are just lovely and helpful. But when you find that what’s required for you to be kind and useful to others is very unkind to yourself, you must change it asap!
I used to think that unless all of my family and friends were happy and successful in every area of their lives; I wasn’t allowed to be satisfied either. I mean how could I be happy if everything wasn’t perfect for those I love? LOL, I think we know how that all worked out for me. It didn’t work at all! I’ve long since realized that I can help if people will receive it, but I am in no way in control of what they do or do not choose.
This week start noticing where you’re feeling obligated to overextend and take the blame so to speak. I mean it's all good when things are good, but when we feel responsible, and things don’t go well for the other person they can try to dump it on us as our fault. It happens in business, romantic relationships, friendships, etc. Be mindful of how it's showing up in your life and make any necessary changes to make it clear you are responsible for you. Let go of all that doesn’t directly involve you. Have an awesome week full of fun and powerful insights!!!