The Habit of Blame

Do you find yourself blaming others for how you feel?

Thinking if this or that person were different then you’d be in a better mood, more successful, or that your entire life would be different?

If you don’t think you do this, I encourage you to pay attention and notice the subtle ways you actually are making others the cause in your reality. 

Yes, we are all programmed in childhood. And we carry loads of cellular memories from our ancestors which can and does impact our life and choices.

But, you do not have to let all those things control what you choose in your own life now.

It is important that you admit if you feel abused, cheated and angry about your upbringing and family dynamics. Then you must decide if you want to wallow in that forever, or dig deeper to free yourself from perpetuating these cycles.

Increasing your awareness can be scary and uncomfortable.

But, it is also one of the most life changing things you can choose. I’ve found that if you weren’t judging what you were aware of you’d easily allow the awareness and move on.

Here are some great questions to ask when you feel resistance.

What am I aware of that I don’t want to know?

Why don’t I want to know this? 

The best way to ask those questions is from a place of lightness and curiosity.

Stay out of looking for a specific answer and allow your higher self to give you the truest unfiltered answer.

Often there’s nothing else for you to do but just have the aha and move on feeling lighter.

There’s a term in somatics called over coupling. Which is where something has been linked to a traumatic or negative experience.

Asking the questions I suggested can help to quickly uncover areas where you’re connecting things to danger that are seemingly not connected at all. 

Our minds will protect us from things that it deems as too overwhelming.

So if you have enough charge around a subject you may feel blocked or confused when you are seeking answers.

Because a part of you has decided that a particular subject is unsafe, off limits and shouldnt be looked at and definitely not changed. 

You might notice you keep avoiding a certain topic or feeling.

Going in loops trying courses, healing, journaling and it's still not changing. And if someone does actually start to help you change this particular area you may attack them, or feel paranoid and stop talking to them.

This all stems from the belief that I shouldn't change this belief or patterns.

If you’re experiencing anything like this. It is a great time to ask or write out what is the value of staying the same. And what is the downside of changing.

Sometimes you may have to admit that you do not want to change. That can be difficult if you’ve paid lots of money, asked many people for help to realize you do not actually want to change.

But, the great part about that is, admitting that is how you open yourself up to finally allow the change. You release yourself from being in a constant internal battle and you create a safe space within. 

Practice creating a safe non judgmental space of total acceptance within you, and you will see how potent and unstoppable you truly are and always have been. 

If you’d like some help getting into your power check out my Stop playing the victim clearing!