Catch Me I’m Falling - Not Like the Cool 80's Song

Last year I made the choice to slow down.

I cut back on work and made healing from trauma and regulating my nervous system top priority.

A few years ago I had a bizarre, very painful physical accident that caused me to see many things in a whole new light.

I had prided myself on always being strong.

Having lots of love, kindness, and support to give.

Even as my body was in so much pain and my nervous system was on high alert constantly. I kept working long hours and pushing myself to do more.

Last year I just couldn’t keep pushing anymore.

More accurately, I didn’t want to, so I didn’t. I felt every fiber of my being going into complete refusal to continue on as I had been.

You know how you get so used to being a certain way that you don’t even notice, until you can’t keep going? 

I hit that wall.

And could finally see how I had been operating and was prolonging my healing from this physical ailment. 

It was a huge awareness of how I had unknowingly put everyone else’s needs before my own.

If you know me you know I’m always reminding others not to do that.

I love the work I do. So it can be easy to miss signs that I need rest. And often the things we refuse to do or are afraid to do are exactly what is called for in order to have what we have been asking for. 

I remember last spring was when it finally sunk in that I was just going to have to slow down. I wasn’t asking permission and I didn’t even care how anyone else felt about it. 

I could feel for weeks that the life force was being drained out of me.

So continuing on the same path would have taken me to a similar bad place that created the situation a few years ago.

Thankfully I caught it, listened and course corrected quickly this time.

I clear myself everyday, little bits during the day usually.

But, my body was asking for more focused attention and for me to go deeper.

I began doing somatic exercises everyday.

And I created my Resilient Nervous System healing audio. It is my favorite, and I listen to it every single day. 

As I did these things for myself and consistently put myself first I was blown away at how things began to shift.

There was a stuckness hanging around, and I finally had a huge breakthrough in a new path for my mouth and jaw to heal. The injury was in that area. And I’ve found so much more ease as I allow myself and my body to take whatever time needed to rest and heal. 

It may sound simple or obvious.

But it's not when you are experiencing it.

The biggest thing I noticed was being able to think more clearly.

I had read and heard people talk about trauma changing the brain but I didn’t fully comprehend.

I couldn’t think straight, I have a fantastic memory and for a few years many memories were gone.

I am very grateful I can remember things and my body feels safe enough that I can move through life without bracing so much.

It took me a while to find any silver lining in this experience and I’m open to discovering a few more.

But, one thing that I realized is that I can help others more in the areas of trauma.

Sure I had experienced trauma before, but nothing like this.

It propelled me to learn more about trauma, nervous system health and to come up with my own unique ways to help myself and others transform traumas.

If you would like my help healing trauma or regulating your nervous system. I’m happy to help.. You can book a private session here.

If you’re not quite ready to do a session I encourage you to get my Resilient Nervous system audio and use it daily!

Take care of yourself, your body will thank you!